Two-Step Anyone? How about One?

I have been smoke-free for 6 ½ years. I started smoking when I was 14 (eek!).  I had just lost my mother a few months earlier and I was dealing with it the best way a teenager could.  One day some classmates of mine offered me a smoke because according to them, I seemed “stressed”.  I took a drag of the cigarette, coughed, gave it back, and decided smoking was not for me.  However, somewhere along the line smoking became a part of my life and stayed in my life for the next 15 years. 

There were moments when I wanted to quit, but it was never the right time.  Each time I attempted, another stressful situation emerged.  Sickness. Family deaths. Job and money loss.  There was always SOMETHING.  So the habit just continued.

 

Fast-forward to 2006.  I was 29 and starting my first year of law school.    I still had this desire to quit smoking.  I did not want to turn 30 and still be a smoker.  Yet, there was no way I could quit smoking while being in this pressure cooker for three years.  Before law school, I was smoking a half pack of cigarettes a day.  During my first semester, I crept up to nearly a pack a day.  With an increased usage, how could I quit at this point?

 

          During the break before my second semester, my church offered a smoking cessation seminar.  Of course, I would try it.  There were about six of us in the seminar.  We met once a week for about 5 weeks.  During the first meeting, we were given information on the health risks and consequences of smoking.  We also talked to each other about our struggles with dropping the habit.  We also stated the date we would quit smoking.  I picked January 8, 2007. 

 

          On January 7th, I threw away my cigarettes, excited that I would take the step to quit.   The next day, I woke up and went about my day.  Around 9:30am, I was a little antsy. By 1pm, I had a cigarette in my hand.  I was so disappointed in myself, but I kept smoking anyway.

 

          Then something happened.  On January 10th, I was standing in a parking lot looking at the Academy, and I realized that my life matters and I deserved to live a healthy life.  The same cigarettes I smoked to help relieve stress was slowly killing me and preventing me from living this desired healthy life.  That turning point gave me the strength and courage to throw away the cigarettes.

         

        What is hurting you?  What is stopping you from living the life that you deserve to have?  It is difficult to take the first step, but that first step is liberating.  Each step you take moves you closer in the direction you want to be.  Please know that when we try to better our lives, there is going to be resistance, and there will be moments when we want to step back, because it is easy and familiar.   Were there times when I thought about a cigarette when I was going through something stressful?  Of course!  Then, I began to think about how good I felt and how much more I was able to do because 1) I could breathe and 2) I was not dependent on cigarettes to get me through the stressful times in life. This outweighed my desire to smoke.

 

          Therefore, I encourage you to take the first step on the path to freedom.  While it may be difficult, I believe it is worth it.

 

          See you next time.